Ugh...

I just feel blah.  I think I drank too much water too quickly.  That is one thing I look forward to not having to deal with after giving birth...being uncontrollably thirsty and not being able to drink as much as I want to.  EVERY time I drink to my satisfaction, that ice cold water with tons of ice in it (sometimes a lemon), I feel soooo sick after.
I also look forward to getting rid of this heartburn!!  Every day I have heartburn and its usually all day.  I wake up choking on it in the middle of the night.  I always feel like there is a volcano erupting in my body.  Lets see, what else....
I look forward to being able to sleep comfortably.  I cant wait to be able to bend over again.  I look forward to not making a big production of getting down/up off the floor.  It will be nice to not have to go to the bathroom a hundred times a day.  I look forward to not vomiting all the time.  It will be nice to be able to breath.  Hmmm....I think that's it for now.
However, I will miss feeling him moving around.  Right now, hes all mine.  I'm never alone.  I'm providing everything he needs...no one else.  That's kind of a special feeling.  While its no secret to anyone that I truly dislike pregnancy,  I feel so blessed to be able to experience it and have my own children.  I have gone from being extremely anxious about having a second (what if I don't love him as much as I love Audra?  How can I possibly manage two kids when on a lot of days, a toddler is more than enough?  Will I ever sleep again?  What if he is refluxy and colicky like Audra was?  Will I lose my mind? ...you get the idea) to being completely at peace with having another.  I am so looking forward to meeting this little guy.  I just want to hold him, snuggle him, take naps with him, look him over to make sure hes completely healthy and perfect...etc.  I think I just came to realize that I have no control over what life will be like with two, but that I will always do my best and Im sure we will all survive =) .

Matthew 6:34
So do not worry about tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

I have found a lot of comfort in this verse.  God will not let me flounder about.  He will not give me more than I can handle.  I have to just turn my worries over to him because hes the one in control anyway.  

So, I will not fail as a mother.  I'm sure I will have my bad days, but my children will be okay.  There is no question that they will always be loved by my husband and I.  I suppose that's all they really want anyway, isn't it?  To be unconditionally loved?